What if? Apart, these two words are harmless but put ‘em together and you may just find yourself confronted with a dangerous task…self-reflection.
Looking back on the past is often avoided by people (myself included) because it can be painful, both emotionally and psychologically. We are reminded of our mistakes and even more so of the fact that we can’t change any of it.
So often, I look back over my journey with epilepsy and I wonder, “Where would I be today if I had only done “this” differently or avoided “that” completely instead of diving in so willingly like I had in the past?” I get completely caught up in the “what if’s?” of life and do you know what this does for me?? Absolutely nothing. I do not benefit from focusing on what I should have done in the past nor what I need to be doing in the future. Here’s the thing about the past, what’s done is done. I cannot change past events, but I can reflect upon my mistakes and hopefully apply all that I have learned to the person I am right here, right now.
I read once that we as humans shouldn’t try to complete our knowledge about life, but instead, we should be lifetime learners so that every moment of life is an opportunity for growth.
In order to fully embrace those opportunities today, we must take our focus off of what we wish we had done but didn’t as well as what we wish we could be doing if only “this, that, and the other thing” would work out in our favor. Instead, we need to shift our focus to today. What is it that you should be doing right now?
We yearn to be successful in all that we do, yet too often we simultaneously get ahead of ourselves AND hold ourselves back because our focus is misplaced. At the end of the day, God already has a perfect plan for your life so there really isn’t a need to obsess about planning the perfect future. By letting go of you and embracing Him you can begin to shift your focus on how you can fulfill His will. Bend your plans to match His by looking for His guidance each day and following His direction as you receive it one step at a time. More importantly, one day at a time. Trust me when I say that it is impossible to try and bend God’s will to fit your plans. Obsessing over the past and the future only distract you from God’s guidance, making it difficult to know exactly which step is the right one.
The truth is, I find myself in the boat of distraction more often than I’d care to admit, but that’s the point! We all mess up, but God always takes us back. It is easy to lose focus on the present. Living with epilepsy has prompted me to wonder how different my life would be if only I had been able to change certain decisions in my past. I know from personal experience that the choice to wander through the maze of past mistakes only leads me further away from Him. Luckily, God always rescues me by providing me with His map of guidance. He has taught me a lot about how to live with epilepsy. The temptation to ponder the notion of “what if?” will always be there, but thanks to God I feel better equipped to handle such a question…
The reality is, I am exactly where I am supposed to be according to God’s will so there is no need to wonder about the past. Okay, confession time…My greatest wish in my past is that there was more information on the subject of Catamenial Epilepsy when I desperately needed to know how to live with such a condition when I was first diagnosed.
Epilepsy Insight #11 is inspired by this wish. I may not be able to change my past, but I’m hoping I can change someone else’s present (and eventually future) by sharing 3 simple tips I have learned while living with Catamenial Epilepsy for the past 11 years. Watch the video below to learn more!
If you have any questions or comments regarding the information I shared, please feel free to contact me via email (firstname.lastname@example.org) or Instagram (@seizethedayblog). Thank you!
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